From what I am reading, half of the country right now is in a massive heat wave.  Ooooo, I LOVE IT!  I am telling you, I was meant to live on the equator.  If I could have beach front property ON the sun, I would.  Of course, I would wear sun block 2000 or Seanna and Heather would kick my behind and I would make sure to have plenty of chapstick for Amy, but I would be in my glory.  Make sure that you are staying hydrated while exercising in the sun.  And poo poo on you right now if you are insisting on working out in a gym right now because it’s hot (Amy).  It’s BEYOOOOOOtiful outside and after the snowpalooza winter we had–we’ve earned this!  Ok, onward and upward…

I am truly considering creating a webpage that puts all the things that women say on it so you never have to feel like it’s “just you”.  Things like:

• I know I sound crazy but…
• Am I the only person you’ve ever worked with who…
• I have to start on Monday.  Let me just get through this weekend and…
• I know you say that this happens when I (fill in blank), but I’m telling you, it works for me…
• I tried that before and it didn’t “work”…

and my favorite…

• I am an All or Nothing Kind of Person…

We are all unique; no two people are alike and you can truly rest on that.  I have worked with a ton of folks and I have yet to meet someone’s exact duplicate.  But as I say that I also have recognize how similar we are in our ways and especially so as women.  I have had some guys who say some of the things that women say but rarely.  For the most part, men take what you give them and do it.  Women, on the other hand, form a committee and ask 8 of their friends if this looks like something they should do even though none of them have ever found anything that “worked”.  Unreal.

This brings me to the next addition to our Disordered Eating series.  The things that we say and think about our diet habits are not very unique although I am sure you feel as if you are the only one that thinks the way that you do.  I have to let you in on a secret:  you are not.  There are some things that, as a nutritionist, I have come to expect:  every woman holds back at least one deceptive behavior that they do only to bring it out later as a trump card (”I know you said not to have… but I have been having it since…), every woman claims they disclose everything in their questionnaire but if you talk to them long enough you will find out that they secretly birthed 3 kids, had malaria and juggle on the weekends with bandits–scary, and lastly every woman starts your plan not by fully adopting it as hers but by slowly integrating the parts she agrees with.  My job is to find out what she agrees with as soon as possible to circumvent drama further down the road.  OY!  So let’s hop right to the things we say and I will keep this brief because for the most part, these are self explanatory.

“I know I sound crazy but…” always precedes some seriously disturbing information that although may make me pause–it still is not unique to you.  This is where our true disordered eating comes to the surface because you are about to convince me that something you do like spinning around before eating or using hot sauce on Cheerios somehow convinces your body to give up the pounds.  I need to make sure I say this right at this point: I am being funny in this post as I tell about ourselves as dieters, but I in NO WAY SHAPE OR FORM make fun of you or judge you in any manner.  If I can get you to look at yourself in a light manner, I can possibly get you to ease up on yourself enough to help you.  Please hear my sincerity here.  Some of us are so serious about ourselves and how we are viewed, that we miss the forest for the trees in terms of moving into health.

“Am I the only person you have ever worked with who…” ate their young while dieting?  Nope.  And whatever else you can fill in the blank there is not unique to you.  I mean this when I say this, stop trying to hold on to your quirkiness as a means of saying ‘this is just you’.  That’s not true, that’s just a form of bondage that you are in full agreement with.  Silence is the enemy.  You keep it in and it will control you.  Unless you are eating grubs from your lawn as fiber, you are not doing anything I haven’t heard.  Really.

“I need to start on Monday.  Let me just get through this weekend and…” act like a jackass at your cousin’s wedding.  Ok.  But just know there is a cost to that.  Basicallly you have just convinced yourself that that is the only way it’s going to go down and anything else will not be effective.  My thing that I do to keep this one from creeping in is starting anything I do food wise on a Wed, Thurs or Fri.  Nip that sucker right in the bud because now if you start on a day other than Monday, you will actually begin to self sabotage to prove you were right.  The mind is a powerful bugger…

“I know you say that “this” happens when I (eat protein only, skip veggies, have a ton of shakes, etc) but I’m telling you it works for me…” Really?  I could be incredibly snarky here, massively sarcastic, beyond over the top in terms of examples but I’m not going to.  Instead I am going to simply say that deep down you know that what you are trying to convince me of is not true or you would not have hired us.  You are at the end of your rope and you are praying that you can change everything but this one behavior even though you know this one behavior is the crux of the issue. 

“I tried that before and it didn’t ‘work’…”  I call this the ultimate trump card.  When you say this to me, you are really saying, “You’re close Jo.  I’m not giving that up or going there again.  There’s history.”  This could be anything:  measuring food, tracking it, eating it in specific meals, cardio regimens–you name it.  What this really says is “I have had my hopes crushed doing that and I am not willing to make myself that vulnerable to you right now.  Sorry.”  I hear you.  Loud and clear.  Now get on that treadmill and track your food.  Ok, I’m not that heartless but we’re down for your cause so you are going to have to put that trump card away…

I will save my favorite one for next week because it’s a doozy.  EVERY woman thinks they are the only one who is all or none.  Umm….yeah…no.  But good try. 

As always, our passion for you is obvious.  Whatever we can do to make clean eating not only a reality for you all the time, but healthy in body AND mindset is our mission.  We love what we do, we love how you look and we love that you let us be a part of it with you.  Take care this week, note all your crazy habits and let us know of any you feel comfortable fessin’ up to below.  More to come!