Before I delve into the annoying world of fitness, I need to laugh about how many folks were taken aback by my snow shoeing!haha  I promise that if I do it I will tell you all about it.  Yes, I know it is cold out there and yes, I know I hate the cold.  But I will give it a go all in the name of fitness and I will report back as soon as possible with details…hehe.

As for whatever you are doing in the gym right now—knock it off!

Honestly, if you troll around the web long enough and begin to read all the training articles out there, no matter what you are doing right now (and it could be the latest and greatest thing) you are doing it ALL wrong and you are awful just for breathing.  In fact, you are a fitness waste that is destined to spend the rest of your life behind the times in leotards and Richard Simmons shorts.  Why you got up this morning is beyond belief—give it up, you suck.

I have no idea how this is supposed to motivate me to want to try whatever it is that they are pushing but this seems to be the norm for so many fitness folk that I am almost wondering if it really is an effective way of marketing one’s self.  Maybe I will try it next week in a post.  I’ll tell you about the newest thing out there and how you are less than human because you don’t know how to do it and not only that, you are archaic because what you are doing is SUCH a waste of time (yes, because working out is silly—whatever) and why aren’t you more efficient and why haven’t you burned 700 cals in 10 min. and then *continued* to burn cals for at least another 20 hours while maximizing your potential to sell real estate to pigmies in Africa who are recovering the best unknown workout recovery secret…(pant, pant, pant).  When did fitness become this full of overbearing folks with heinous agendas? OY!

Here’s my deal…  Workout.  Now.  That’s it.  I don’t care what you do, just break a sweat.  If you decide that your cardio for the day is going to be laundry and you walk up and down 2 flights of stairs with a laundry basket about 8 times, so be it!  If you think shop lifting in Walmart is the way to go and then being chased through the parking lot by undercover cops for cardio is appealing, just wear a heart rate monitor—it’s all I ask.  Say you decide to live on the edge and go for something new so you take up swimming…indoors…in the fountain at the center of the Burlington Mall…and you find a lot of change…GOOD!  Buy some new workout gear with it!  I don’t care what you do as long as you do something!!

If you want to split hairs and talk about optimizing and etc, save that for when you’re feeling perfect.  There’s about 2 weeks out of the year when we feel that way.  The rest of the time we’re just trying to get it done and hope that nothing gets in our way lest we don’t make it to the gym that day.  YKWIM?  So I’m here to cut some slack for you folk out there who are feeling like you are not doing all that you can because you keep reading how you are doing it all wrong:  tell them to go blow it out their backside and start counting everything under the sun as a workout including yelling in traffic, pacing because you have to go to the bathroom and running out of time! 

Stand up for yourself and don’t get bullied by these crazy exercise folks!  Almost started feeling bad about myself because I worked out for an hour today…what a waste of my time.  I could have worked out for 7 min. and maintained a high EPOC for 23 hours and then dropped 10 pounds before breakfast!   Instead I chose to “make myself fatter” by doing a complex or 2 and finishing out with some cardio…SHEESH!  Who knew?

Whatever you choose to do, I am glad you are doing something!  Feel free to let us know about it if it is something unique.  Have fun!:o)